i hate to leave

i hate to leave

when now i am very comfortable of what ive been doing everyday in my life here
when i know im not that strong to leave independently far from my family *internally*
when i know my leaving will only make me far from my friends *you know who you are*
when everything is so hard there
when i dont have anyone that i can trust there
when there is a lot of big mouths trying to eat and swallow me slowly
when it seems that there is a big hole of darkness
when i feel empty and no shoulders to lean
when there is no one to actually hear my heart cry out loud
when i know you never had chance to be there on the time when i need you
when i know i dont have that same time again with you
when i know i will hardly to see you again after this
when my leaving will make the whole house to turn out to be differently

ouh i really2 hate to leave home.